December 04, 2007
The Course Of True Love Never Did Run Smooth...
Right now I'm waiting for my mom to come home so she can take me to my appointment with my counselor. Yes, I still see a counselor. She helps me with the small problems that I have, mostly with the boys issue. I'm doing fine now, but it's nice to have someone to talk to.
Tonight I'm going to tell her about Cap and SG. Nothing happened with Cap today. I was going to talk to him, but his friends came up to him. Dang, why'd he have to have friends who love him so much? Why can't he be just a lonely little emo kid? (Kidding...I'm glad he has good friends. That's such an important thing to have in your life, and I'm glad he has that).
What I'm also going to talk to her about is a story about a girl named Katherine Lester. This girl, about two years ago, started talking to a man named Abdullah who lived in the West Bank. She talked to him for seven months, and then ran away to see him. She got caught, but she promised still to marry him. When she turned 18, she went back to the West Bank to see him.
Now, for awhile this girl was my hero. She was able to love this man through these tough circumstances (MUCH more extreme than the love I have now by the way), how the world wanted them apart, and yet she still loved him. She held onto him for so long.
But she came back to the US, and she broke up with him. He wasn't the man she thought he was. He was abusive, physically and verbally. He was also very controlling and possessive.
So, it just made me feel, after reading this tonight, that it might be okay if things don't work out, because things still didn't work out for her.
But man, oh man, I still really wish that they'd work out! He is my love, my life, my soulmate...I love him so much, even though he treats me like crap.
Man, I make no sense at all...
But about Cap. What I might do, and I've been thinking about doing this for awhile, is call his friend, who I've known pretty much all my life, and see if he can help us with a friendship. A friendship has got to be the base if we're ever going to have a relationship.
You'd think that since I'm working on a book about boys and dating, that I'd have all the answers, right? Well, it's just the opposite, just the opposite...
And so...all I can think of else to say right now is what I've already said before. I just hope things with somebody work out. I've been waiting since I was a thirteen years old, maybe even before, to recieve my first kiss....
wait4you at 6:41 p.m.
